Wife Disinterested in Sex
My wife and I have been married going on 29 years this month and have been a couple for 31 plus years. Our relationship early on was pretty much full of sex. Sometimes to the point that I would get sore and have to stop for a few days before resuming. as the years have gone on my desire has not waned but I can't say the same for my wife. I think I have heard every excuse there is for not having sex. She says that's all I think about. At 55 years young I still feel I could go every day. My wife has diabetes now for 10 years she has high blood pressure and high cholesterol. I realize that those conditions will decrease bedroom activity, but we have had sex just once in the last 3 1/2 years. I am sorry but I don't think that's normal. She also cheated on me about six years ago and we decided to stay together. I am now wondering if that was wise. I don't know what to do I am very frustrated and am about to look elsewhere for satisfaction. What to do?
Given the extent of your relationship and commitment, and the health issues and history of infidelity, it might be worth going to see a sex therapist in your area. There are probably a number of reasons why she's not feeling sexual. On a simple level, she could be a candidate for a testosterone supplement, but my guess is that there's a number of underlying dynamics at work. You're absolutely right to feel like sex should be a part of your relationship. Certainly desire can wane with age, but I know plenty of couples in their mid-50s who have active healthy sex lives. In general to have a healthy sex life you have to have the sort of relationship that supports having a healthy sex life, so my sense is that there are relationship issues that need to be worked on.
I don’t’ doubt the physical ailments you’ve noted will inhibit sexual performance. Often these ailments are linked to obesity which in and of itself can affect sexual desire due to concerns about body image. I’m thinking a sound nutrition and exercise plan may be beneficial in reviving her waning sex drive. It will improve her body image, circulation and energy levels which are all essential to a positive sex drive.
Ahh. I have the same problem. 25 years married 28 together. It took a long time for my wife to finish menopause. Now she has no interest in sex at all. Desire decressed over time and now it is down to nothing. Her whole personality changed and she doesn't seem to be as happy , fun or interested in me in general. She has tried or is trying the hormone replacement theraphy. It has helped in other ways but it has not helped her desire for intmacy. I am sleeping in the other room on a regular basis. If our lives weren't so connected with money , property and time, I would call it quits. I am over 60 , in great shape by the way, (so is she). I wouldn't anticipate having any more sex if I were single than I do now. But I wouldn't be living with the resentment and dissapointment that I currently have. I have talked about this with her a million times and she just seems powerless to chnage. I have no advice for you or anybody in this situation.