The vaginal orgasm
Hi, I'm feeling a little down lately because I'm one of those girls (a majority I hear) who are unable to orgasm through penetrative sex :( It seems I can only orgasm when my boyfriend orally stimulates my clitoris. I don't have a problem with becoming aroused at all. I enjoy penetrative sex very much but it just never brings me to orgasm. I've tried all sorts of different positions and nothing seems to work. If he tries using his fingers while penetrating me at the same time I feel overstimulated to the point where I don't feel anything at all + the same with toys (if that makes sense...). I don't suffer from any form of anxiety and I'm not really too stressed. However sometimes I am a little conscious of my body. I'm not overweight but I am a little jiggly~
I guess I just feel like I'm missing out on something I hear a lot of girls enjoying. Is there anything I can do to improve the likely-hood of orgasming vaginally??
i am not one of the experts on here but my girlfriend used to have trouble too and here is what we discovered (thanks to an older post in this blog): when she is on top (partner is lying on bed flat on his back and she is on top on her knees with her feet under her butt cheeks) it is a lot easier, its even easier when i take my thumb and stimulate her clitoris while penetrating her, and she goes absolutely nuts if shes on top and i place my hands on her hips and thrust into her lifting my back up off the bed (bumpy ride for her!) - she actually experienced "multiple o's" for the first time doing this. but then i took it even further and thought i was going to kill her she went so crazy: i wore a vibrating jelly cock ring. which i also liked because it made my penis look enormous and hard as a rock.
Oh. This again! You're not alone. I don't know why, but somehow we've been taught that us ladies are supposed to be coming every ten seconds, every time we have sex, and every time we're touched. For most of us, it ain't happening, and that's normal. Some women are built to have orgasms every time they have sex, but most of us aren't.
Yesterday, I was talking with a friend who said for years she thought she was having orgasms every time she had sex, and then she had an actual orgasm a year ago, and realized she hadn't been orgasming with sex. So, as you can see, it's all very mystical and confusing. Bottom line: don't feel abnormal for not having orgasms with vaginal sex. Most of us don't.
If you're determined to have an orgasm with vaginal sex, check out our e-book on female orgasms, and our mini-guide on female orgasms.
You may also check out the movie Orgasm Inc.. It's a movie about the search for a female sexual arousal pill, and the discussion that comes up around female orgasm is fascinating.
For what it's worth, I agree with the first responder - the boyfriend. There's niothing like a hot warm body under you. One other thought - there are diff levels of orgasm. Like notes on a piano, some are more intense than others. It's all good.
My partner orgasms from being on top and grinding not from thrusting. If you haven't already tried that you might want to.
Perhaps you might think of this as a quest for orgasm #2 vaginally after enjoying the first one orally.
What about a quick transition from oral to intercourse? Can you come more than once after the oral? And can you come via masturbation? What happens when you masturbate during intercourse?
Sex is the ultimate do-it-yourself science experiment. Practice, and enjoy!