I have a friend I met in a round about way through a rape survivors website. He is also a survivor of rape and domestic violence. As I have difficulty even hugging someone, he and I began working on my hugging issues with cyber hugs. It even got to the place that I felt safe enough to "sleep" in his bed with him. I sleep better at night on the nights I cuddle with him.
It surprised us both when we became close emotionally. He encourage me to go on my first date since I left my husband 19 months ago. Then he sat up all night worrying about my safety. About a week ago, it turned into cyber sex. He is worried, not about himself, but that he is taking advantage of me. I don't see how a gay man engaging in and enjoying cyber sex with a straight woman is taking advantage of her. He's terrified he will be thought a monster for it.
It's a truly safe way for me to find triggers, just saying the words can trigger me, and he always helps me calm down. I love the respect I get from this man.