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• Commented on Husband doesn't initiate sex
  In long-term relationships, partners often start worrying more about upsetting their spouse than their own desire. They learn how to put a damper on their own wants if they worry that their partners may be unhappy or upset with them...
• Commented on Sexual Addiction
  People are considered "sexually addicted" for many different reasons. Often, people try to feel more attractive, or more connected, or boost their self-worth by having repeated sexual encounters. If they learn about the reasons fueling their behavior, they can learn...
• Commented on DE, masturbation, porn...
  I agree with Ian that it's not just about sex - it is also about his resposibility to you and your sex life. I don't know how long you have been trying to get this addressed, but you do have...
• Commented on Enhancement Gel
  This cream appears to use a combination of menthol and propylene glycol to give a person a tingly sensation, and niacin to try to bring blood to the external tissues. I don't really see why this is necessary since it...
• Commented on Lasting Longer
  Did you ever explore Ian's question - what are you doing differently? Do you drink alcohol or take other medications?...
• Commented on How long should an erection last?
  Most men could reach orgasm in a minute - minute and a half if they get "optimal" stimulation. That doesn't mean that they can't last longer, and many men do last longer in order to have sex longer. Some men...
• Commented on 25 Year Old Virgin Questioning Relationship Status
  Certainly deciding when to have your first sexual intercourse is a very personal decision that is based on many factors. If you are having struggles with the physical impulses, this is a good sign that points to your physical and...
• Commented on Porn and sex chat induced erectile dysfunction
  Thank you for this question. Porn certainly creates difficulties when it goes beyond the point of balance in the brain to overtake the reward centers and then decrease it's response to the actual world. A 12-step program certainly does help...
• Commented on Difficulty having orgasm
  It is not uncommon for a woman to be orgasmic by herself, but not with a partner. This can be because they are too distracted or cannot allow themselves to relax enough. Do you notice if your mind is wandering...
• Commented on male abstinence
  What Ian is saying is very important. People who aren't attentive to pleasure prior to marriage usually don't change much after marriage. Those people who wait for religious reasons still feel, become excited with close contact and kissing, touching, etc....
• Commented on Sex and Diabetes
  There are certainly many different options, but I hear you when you say you don't want him to feel put down. You have to see what he is receptive to using, but sometimes including toys can be very helpful. Couples...
• Commented on Ultimatum?
  Since it affects your life overall (not just lack of sex, but not increased stress and depression), you owe it to yourself to address it. If you decide that you can live without it, that is your choice. If, however,...
• Commented on weird unpleasent "Breast orgasm"
  Well you lucky girl you!! Count yourself fortunate among those women that can reach orgasm from stimulation of their breasts. It sounds as if you are there, but then you are having some negative feelings about it that are derailing...
• Commented on Sexual dysfunction
  Many times, people can be pretty cut off from their physical experience - usually for psychological or relational reasons. When you talk about feeling - do you mean physically or emotionally? Physically, damage to the nerves in the area (chronic...
• Commented on Sex Everyday?
  Good for you Dagiit! Pleasure without the pressure of orgasm is a wonderful experience that you can practice everyday if you wish. I'm sure that it will be a long-time practice for you....
• Commented on Porn issue...or is it?
  If you don't have an issue with him watching porn, then it sounds like it would be helpful to talk to him about it because you are making yourself feel insecure. Perhaps you could find him watching it and then...
• Commented on wife's fear of emotional, physical intimacy
  I agree - seeing someone about this issue could be helpful for her. But she has to want to change. Without motivation coming from her, she will not change. It seems that nothing has motivated her to change so far....
• Commented on Psychological Erectile Dysfunction
  What is the difference for you between being with your ex and being with a new partner? Examine the point when you are getting anxious and ask yourself what have you overcome with your ex that you do not fall...
• Commented on I don't orgasm
  Michi - darling! Only about 30% of women orgasm with penetration. The rest of us fInd a way to stimulate ourselves to orgasm by stimulating our clitoris either before, during, or after (or combination thereof)! Who put this crazy idea...
• Commented on Problem with having erections
  Which medications do you take? So many different medications can affect your erections....
• Commented on Fiancée's one night stand before we met keeps popping into head during sex
  Is she a different person now that you know this? What she lived before she met you is 1. completely separate from you, and 2. irrelevant to your relationship now. Get over yourself. She is a real person with a...
• Commented on whats going on?
  Many times anxiey can make it difficult for a man to last during intercourse. But so can eroticism and excitement. Are you determined to have your orgasms this way, or would it be fine to come with oral first, then...
• Commented on Sex with husband a lost cause?
  Long awkward pauses happen when he is waiting to get some reponse from you to see how to proceed. Have you had a discussion about how you communicate/how you would like to communicate during sex - both verbally and non-verbally?...
• Commented on boring...
  After being together for years, most couples know what to expect. That doesn't mean it has to be boring. Excitement comes when you focus on the erotic thoughts you have and the delight you take in being with him. Boring...
• Commented on Orgasm problems
  Mike - if she enjoys orgasm with masturbation, then I don't really see an orgasm "problem." Most women (75% or so) do not orgasm with intercourse because the clitoris (which is the main focal point of nerves creating pleasure) is...
• Commented on idiosyncratic mastubatory style
  IMS is a little different for men than for women. In men, they may masturbate with too much pressure/force/speed that they can't get the same sensation from a partner. With women, although they can also make it more difficult for...
• Commented on Spicing things up?
  The idea behind a vacuum device for the vulva is to bring more blood into the erectile tissue that is under the skin. Such devices can have benefits for women who have difficulty getting engorgement there (women in menopause, those...
• Commented on staying hard after ejaculation
  Are they 16 years old? Are they on cocaine? Are they lying? I'm not saying that there aren't some men that can continue with an erection after orgasm and ejaculation, but this is not typical and is usually only...
• Commented on Never had an orgasm with someone else
  Orgasms are funny things. They could take a lot of effort and physical precision, or they could come in your sleep without any physical contact whatsoever, just because of your sexy thoughts. This means that the psychological aspect of orgasm...
• Commented on Keeping the "boner"
  Are you anxious about having sex with her? Do you have worries that you will not "do it right" or no be able to please her? If this is the case, the anxiety sets into motion a process that directly...