Comment Threads

• eammon commented on Are you comfortable talking about sex?
  Doctor C, I am like Cowboy. I have been married for 34 years and reluctant to discuss sex with my wife. We have never been the type to discuss sex. Due to some surgeries (orchiectomies)and treatment for low T, I need different types of arousal. The unfortunate part is they are outside the comfort zone that has been in effect for our married life. I too want to discuss it anywhere but in bed. She would rather talk about it in bed. To me, that places people in vulnerable positions. So, a few years ago, when I asked about something...
• Ian Kerner commented on Are you comfortable talking about sex?
  Sounds like you and your wife have a long history of not wanting to talk about sex. But it's a positive sign that still asks you what you would like during sex. Instead of trying to lead her out of her comfort zone, why don't you suggest things that are within her comfort zone and focus on conversations and interactions that are without sexual pressure?...
• Ian Kerner commented on Are you comfortable talking about sex?
  I think it's important to get comfortable talking about sex as soon as possible in a relationship. Even if you're just casually dating, it's important to be able to talk about sex, and to think of these conversations as "training-wheels" for having them down the line. The ability to talk constructively about sex is part of the sexual identity (and evolution) that we bring with us from relationship to relationship....
• tnc_2010 commented on Are you comfortable talking about sex?
  Not at all comfortable. My wife and I waited until marriage for sex and are each other's only partners so we've both had to feel things out for ourselves over the course of the last 15 years. As a result, sex is somewhat predictable and is OK, but not fantastic. It's not a huge issue in our marriage, but I think both of us would like it to be better. We both recognize the need to talk more openly and have made some attempts, but without a bigger frame of reference and with the inhibitions we both brought into the...
• Deirdre commented on Are you comfortable talking about sex?
  My husbnd and I kind of in same boat, although we each had 2-4 sex partners b4 marriage (and I had an unfort exp. in college after drinking too much at a frat). I suggest sex videos-NOT porn. These dvd's show techniques, not a creep banging a slut who moans too loud. The dvd's are tasteful & include expert commentary-they are not sleazy. We watched one on slowing down the sex to increase duration, one on anal sex (which we tried a few times, but decided it wasn't for us.) Not sure it would fit your values, but we also...