Kate McCombs, MPH

  • Commented on I've never received oral sex. Maybe some advice?
    The fact that it took you 15 years to ask for oral sex from your wife suggests that the sexual communication in your relationship could use some upgrading. I'm glad you finally got the courage to ask and I'm sorry...
  • Commented on Boyfriend checking out other things..
    I wonder if it's truly insecurity or if it's actually just variety he's seeking. Many people also don't want to engage in their kinkier fantasies with their primary partner. Lots of people want variety in their fantasy life, but it...
  • Commented on Frigid liar . . .
    I responded to your earlier question with some similar advice: I think you'd get a lot out of some sessions with a qualified sex therapist. They could help you unpack the psychological factors that have contributed to the physical experiences...
  • Commented on losing interest
    I'd highly recommend seeking some therapy from a qualified sex therapist. They could help you and your partner unpack the layers of what's going on with your respective sexual challenges and help you communicate/rebuild trust. You can find one near...
  • Commented on Male sex drive
    It sounds like his sex drive is on the high end of normal, but certainly not atypical. But whether or not it's normal doesn't sound like the issue - you and he want different amounts of sex and want different...
  • Commented on Turned on by boyfriend with other women...
    It is very common for people to have desires change and emerge over time. Desires and fantasies are not static - they can show up out of nowhere like the one you describe. It doesn't mean you're crazy. The thing...
  • Commented on I don't want to degrade myself anymore
    It's quite common for people to find things a turn on that they don't want to do in real life, but it sounds like you're particularly distressed by these fantasies. It sounds like you're wanting more control and choice about...
  • Commented on Casual sex in university
    Thanks for your question. It sounds like you're on the right track for having some positive casual sex encounters. While I think it's awesome that you're wanting to avoid being creepy and forceful, being direct can be great. Saying what...
  • Commented on Female orgasm an refusal of cunnilingus
    You should never insist on doing anything to her sexually. If she doesn't like cunnilingus, respect her preferences. Instead, ask her what she DOES want and do those things....
  • Commented on Sex drive
    Career problems and the stress that can come with them can certainly affect sex drive. Many people experience sexual challenges after facing career-related stress. My advice would be to find some ways to healthily manage your stress, like mindfulness meditation,...
  • Commented on handjobs
    Did you have a specific question we can help you with?...
  • Commented on Am I physically felling pleasure and it is just not registering?
    I can see why this is frustrating for you. It's a bit unusual, but certainly not unheard of. Here's a few resources for you. There'a book called "The Elusive Orgasm" that may be of help. "Come As You Are" by...
  • Commented on Tips for our sharing fantasy
    It sounds like she's really open to talking about and exploring this fantasy with you. Is your issue that you're feeling conflicted that you snooped on her computer? I would agree that that's not a good behavior for building trust,...
  • Commented on Why are my orgasms so weak?
    Has anything significant changed in your health since this change has happened with you orgasms? Sometimes certain medications, like some antidepressants, can have this effect on orgasms. If that's the case, it can be possible to change which medications you're...
  • Commented on I Need Help With My Performance... What Should I Do Differently?
    The main thing to do would be to spend far more time on foreplay. The vagina needs time to "tent" - the physiological process of expanding that happens during arousal. Vaginas need time to expand in order to accommodate a...
  • Commented on Messed up gay-str8 affair
    It sounds like you already know what you need to do - end your sexual relationship with this man. I know that would be super hard, but it sounds like this relationship is ultimately a source of pain for you,...
  • Commented on starting to loose control
    It sounds extremely understandable that after retiring from your stressful job and having some decompressing experiences, your sex drive would enhance. It's possible that in the increased intensity of it, and after a long period of drought, you're experiencing a...
  • Commented on Boyfriend has small penis
    I can see why this is awkward for you. You really enjoy penetrative sex and this new guy's a bit small for you. First of all, it's OK if this is a deal breaker for you. Sexual incompatibility is legitimate....
  • Commented on trouble reaching orgasm
    I wouldn't say you're "addicted" (vibrators are not heroin or alcohol) - I would say you're "accustomed." Vibrators are highly efficient tools for producing orgasms. You've gotten used to using an efficient tool for creating a desired outcome and human...
  • Commented on Urination during Climax
    It's much more likely that you have started ejaculating. The fluid that makes up female ejaculation comes out of the urethra just as urine does and can feel a bit like peeing. It's different in that it doesn't smell like...
  • Commented on Anxiety and dating
    I can see why this experience would be a bit upsetting for you since it differed from your past experiences. I didn't find a specific question in your entry - can you clarify exactly what you'd like help with?...
  • Commented on Giving fellatio
    I don't have enough information to tell you whether it's safe or not. Is he distressed by this reaction? Are the effects long lasting?...
  • Commented on I can't go on top even if I want to
    My first thought is, are you sufficiently turned on when you're trying to get his penis inside you? Often when the vagina is tight, it's not from lack of experience - it's from lack of arousal. If this might be...
  • Commented on mynjguy - my career - my guilt
    It sounds like you have a lot of unprocessed feelings about what happened. My advice would be to process them with someone other than your husband. Perhaps a trusted friend or a counsellor. You may or may not choose to...
  • Commented on Threesome while in a great relationship
    It sounds like he seriously violated both you and your friend's boundaries and agreements. That's more than being stubborn - that's disrespectful and trust-breaking. Moving forward will depend on how you feel about it....
  • Commented on Girlfriend is a selfish lover
    Do you have a specific question about your situation?...
  • Commented on How Much Sex in a LDR?
    It doesn't sound like you're being dramatic - it sounds like you're a bit confused about what's "normal" and you're having a bit of trouble communicating what your optimal amount of sex is relative to your boyfriend's needs. That sounds...
  • Commented on masterbation
    If she's already watching you masturbate, it sounds like she's probably pretty open to the topic. Ask her if it would feel sexy to her to masturbate with you. If that is something she would like, invite her to do...
  • Commented on Perminent ED
    The first thing I'd recommend is to believe your wife when she tells you she is OK with vibrators and oral sex. Not believing her words, and the impact that will have on your trust, will do more damage to...
  • Commented on Sex
    I imagine this was either a strange light reflection, or the result of the the wetness making the mattress pattern show up through the white sheet....
Subscribe to feed Recent Actions from Kate McCombs, MPH