Advice from the Experts

Reconsidering the Pill

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. December 08, 2011

So many women have come to use birth control pills (or other forms of hormonal birth control), and certainly they have allowed women the freedom to have a healthy sexual involvement while staying free of pregnancy until they are ready to start a family.  But in the recent years, we...

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Pelvic Floor Dysfunction

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. December 08, 2011

The muscles of the pelvic floor evolved as a sling of muscles to help control our urethral, vaginal, and anal sphincters.  Also known as the PC muscles, the pelvic floor can be envisioned like a hammock of several muscles criss-crossing over each other to form a network.  They are like...

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Diabetes and Sex

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. December 08, 2011

Diabetes is a progressive disease that can debilitate one's body organ by organ when left out of control.  It's most famous for contributing to heart disease, stroke, peripheral vascular disease, blindness, renal failure.  But long before any of these take place, diabetes can kill your sex life. Diabetes itself is...

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Ouch! When Sex Hurts

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT December 05, 2011

Ladies, have you ever found yourself gritting your teeth instead of sighing with pleasure during sex? Guys, have you ever noticed that your partner seems disconnected--or not as into it as you are? It could be because the love you're making together is painful for her. In their new book...

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Are Women More Sexually Adventurous than Men?

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT November 09, 2011

Recently, the team here at Good in Bed conducted a survey on relationship boredom and we were surprised to learn that nearly 50% of couples were bored in their relationships, both in and out out of the bedroom. But we were also comforted to learn that just as many couples...

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Are You Nice (enough) to Your Spouse?

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT October 21, 2011

Earlier this year, eminent marriage therapist John Gottman released a new book titled "The Science of Trust: Emotional Attunement for Couples." While you may not recognize Gottman by name, you may be aware of his work via Malcolm Gladwell's book "Blink." In that bestseller, readers were introduced to Gottman's knack...

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Online Dating and the Problem of Too Much Choice

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT September 28, 2011

If online dating hasn't led you to your perfect match, perhaps the issue isn't that you're too choosy, but rather that there's too much choice. There's no doubt that dating in the 21st century offers a lot of opportunities. Think about your parents' generation: They grew up with no Internet,...

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The Art of Simultaneous Satisfaction

Posted by Emily Nagoski, Ph.D. September 23, 2011

Romance novels and movies are awash in simultaneous orgasms. Hero and Heroine (read that like you're Dudley Do-Right) cross that exquisite threshold, launch themselves willingly over a trembling edge, and tumble downward in a spiraling, panting tangle of sheets and sweat. It's terribly compelling, terribly romantic, this notion of fusing...

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How Many Times a Day do Men Really Think About Sex?

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT September 15, 2011

Gentlemen, lest you were alarmed you might be abnormal for not thinking about sex once every 7 seconds (more than 8,000 times a day), a new study in the Journal of Sex Research arrives to reassure you. Men, on average, think about sex far less than that much-hyped interval. (Where...

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Indications of Prostate Problems

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. September 08, 2011

A man's prostate gland is located just below the urinary bladder and is responsible for producing alkaline fluid that mixes with sperm and secretions from the seminal vesicles to make up semen.  Normally, a man is not really aware of his prostate unless he has prostate stimulation with his partner...

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Understanding Erectile Disorder

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. August 22, 2011

Picture this: You're in the middle of a fierce make-out session and reach down to grab what you expect will be a hard, throbbing erection. Instead, your hand is met with a disappointingly soft penis. Or maybe he's got an erection now, but loses it before you can actually get busy. Sure,...

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When Sex Lasts too Long

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. August 01, 2011

When it comes to sex and the male member, the laws of physics don't always apply. What goes up sometimes comes down all too quickly, or sometimes stays up all too long. Never-ending stamina--and an always-hard penis-- may sound great on paper, but in reality, it can be awkward and...

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Eating for Sex

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT July 30, 2011

It's been said that the way to a lover's heart is through his (or her) stomach, and there's no doubt that the very act of preparing a delicious meal for your partner could score you points. But can certain foods actually increase your sexual desire?We've all heard claims that foods...

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Is Casual Sex Easy or Hard?

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT July 28, 2011

To do it, or not to do it: That is the question of casual sex - at least as depicted on film. In both "Friends With Benefits" (currently playing) and the previously released "No Strings Attached," casual sex is anything but casual. It's carefully weighed, hotly debated, methodically scrutinized and,...

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Low Female Desire

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. July 20, 2011

There are many reasons why women experience a loss of sexual desire. One of the most common, and least acknowledged, is the use of hormonal birth control. Most birth control pills and other hormonal birth control methods use some form of estrogen. The effect this has in the body is...

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5 Very Common Sex Issues

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT June 20, 2011

As a sex counselor and author, I end up talking to a lot of people about their sex lives. And not just in the office. Sometimes I can't walk down the street without someone stopping me with a question - my upstairs neighbor, the deli guy who makes my sandwich,...

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Men: Is Your Penis Aging?

Posted by Madeleine Castellanos, M.D. May 29, 2011

Grayer hair. Deeper crow's feet. Extra pounds around your middle. Like it or not, most of us expect these changes as we get older. But what's more surprising to many couples is the effect that aging can have on their sexuality. Don't let Hugh Hefner fool you: Try as he...

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Getting in Sexual Sync

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT May 10, 2011

Picture this: You're in bed with your partner and everything seems great. But suddenly, you're seeing fireworks and she's fizzled out. So what happened? Simply put, you may have assumed that, when it comes to being turned on, women and men are a lot alike. Nothing could be further from...

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How to Deal with Mismatched Libidos

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT May 10, 2011

With an estimated 40 million Americans stuck in sexless marriages, mismatched libidos could be the No. 1 sex-related issue facing couples in long-term relationships. Generally, at the start of a relationship, the thrill of infatuation keeps us sexually motivated - the whole "can't keep your hands off of each other"...

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Mindful of Love

Posted by Ian Kerner, Ph.D., LMFT May 06, 2011

I frequently deal with people stuck in ruts, slumps and negative cycles of behavior, and I'm always interested in learning more about new ways to help them get back on the right track. Sometimes a fresh idea comes from an unexpected source. For example, not too long ago I gave...

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