The Doctor is In!

Messed up gay-str8 affair

By Ab80 on Apr 11, 2017 at 2:48 AM

I'm a queer Aussie guy. Years ago I met a guy through friends and ended up staying with him. I was quite infatuated but knew he was straight least until he asked me to fool around with him so in my lust I leapt at the chance. He next morning we agreed the pass it off as a drunken experiment. But I was falling for him big time. I told him how I felt and he rejected me. it took me a long time to get over him. We stayed in contact but just as mates. A year later we met and it happened again. This has now happened several times over the years. Each time the sex is better. Each time I tell myself not to get emotionally involved. At best he's bi and that this is unrequited love. We have confided a lot of things so it hurts when he goes cold. I really need advice. Do I end all contact? I'm trying hard to just get over him but it's been going on for more than 7 years! My friends tell me it's all bad news and to never see him again but my heart leaps when he contacts me. Can anyone help?

1 reply

Kate McCombs, MPH | Apr 12, 2017 at 8:33 AM | Reply | Report

It sounds like you already know what you need to do - end your sexual relationship with this man. I know that would be super hard, but it sounds like this relationship is ultimately a source of pain for you, even if it's punctuated with periodic pleasurable experiences. It doesn't sound like you are ever going to get what you're wanting out of it.

My advice would be to tell him the next time he contacts you that you both want different things and you need to stop being sexually involved. Make sure you have good support from loving friends when you do that because I imagine it'll be difficult. Ultimately, you'll be in a much better place to connect with someone who's looking for the same things you are.

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